Now that the rotations are over, it feels strange to be left to our own devices. A lot of people apply to do fine art so that they can do whatever they want without restriction, but right now the thought of being plunged into the depths of the unknown is terrifying. Unlike some, I find it difficult to just ‘do’ first and think later so the notion of just playing with materials and seeing where it goes in order to generate ideas annoys me. Materials are expensive and I want to use them when I at least have some sort of idea of what I’m doing, otherwise I feel like it is a waste. I found myself sitting in my studio space today. Just sitting. I hated it. There was literally nothing there, the lights had been turned off and there was darkness. Trying to take a step back from the work I have already begun, whilst I know that there are things left unresolved, and trying to start afresh is a real struggle. The idea of going in any direction excites me, but is overwhelming and frightening at the same time. An artistic oxymoron. To make up for a lack of anything productive I decided to rearrange my workspace, to freshen it up a bit seeing as it has slowly reduced to piles of paper, books and scrap wood. I thought that if I had a series of visual inspirations surrounding me then it might spur me on to add to it. It is a mix of work from all of the previous rotations in addition to some research images and some photographs from my summer project. In amongst all of this, I am sure there is some form of inspiration which I can draw from. Until then I am going back to basics and collecting source material from books and journals which I find interesting, and gathering it together to make a visual brainstorm; a resource of information which I can draw from to find a new direction in which to take my work. I am also pursuing an idea which Neil discussed with me yesterday; the filling of a sketchbook in a short amount of time – a day or a week. Becoming freer and less precious about making work, and documenting the everyday through a series of material experiments. I am currently recording journeys and interesting textures in an A5 sketchbook, and I intend to fill it this week. I’m also recording sounds using a Dictaphone. I already hate it, I have no idea what relevance it has to anything but I am gritting my teeth and going through with it, maybe by pushing myself through it I will have some sort of epiphany at the end of it. I can only hope.
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AuthorThird Year BA Hons Fine Art student studying at Falmouth University Archives
April 2017
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